


Becks Ice (tyrelliot)

by jocalvins



Series: Tyrelliot One Shot Collection [1]
Category: Mr. Robot (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bisexual, First Kiss, Fluff, Friendship/Love, Gay, M/M, Mutual Pining, One Shot, Partying, Tyrell as an exchange student, tyrelliot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-06-27
Updated: 2019-06-27
Packaged: 2020-05-20 17:33:13
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,198
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19381459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jocalvins/pseuds/jocalvins
Summary: Elliot didn't think he would see Tyrell ever again after their friendship ended years ago, but then they meet again at a party and all of his feelings come back up...(Vaguely based on "Becks Ice" by Von Wegen Lisbeth, doesn't matter at all if you don't know the song though)





	Becks Ice (tyrelliot)

He wasn't supposed to be here.

Maybe this was a glitch in the matrix, maybe he had somehow entered a parallel universe and no one had told him, but this was completely impossible. His fingers started shaking, as he held on closer to the glass in his hand.

When Angela had told him to have a drink so he would "cheer up" and "relax", he had laughed at her. How was he supposed to relax with all these people around? He hated parties. And now ... now THIS.

Angela hadn't seen the certain someone yet, obviously - she was too busy flirting with every average looking straight guy she could find. Her taste in men had always been terrible, no doubt about it. All these arrogant, sexist jerks she ended up with - Elliot would never get used to them.

But now he certainly had more important problems. 99 problems and the tall guy across the room was every single one of them.

He hadn't changed at all. If he had, maybe Elliot would be able to convince himself that this was just a doppelganger. But it wasn't just his face, the striking blue eyes, the slicked back blonde hair that felt a lot softer than it looked. Elliot shook his head, shaking off the memory.

No, it wasn't just that. It was the arrogant smirk on his lips, the look in his eyes, the way he immediately seemed so much softer when he genuinely laughed. It had never been hard to tell when Tyrell REALLY found something funny - his whole face scrunched up and he didn't look so condescending anymore. He looked almost adorable.

"Angela?"

She immediately stopped talking to the flashy asshole and turned to Elliot. At least he knew he could always count on her, no matter what.

"Look." He raised his glass and pointed towards the guy who was most definitely Tyrell Wellick.

Angela raised her eyebrows. "Who?"

Elliot rolled his eyes internally. Maybe she was so drunk that she really couldn't see what he was referring to?

He raised his hand and pointed again, while making sure that no one else saw what he was pointing at.

She tilted her head. "Meh, too blonde for my taste."

It was unbelievable. He sighed. So Angela would be of no assistance in this situation, awesome. He downed the beer at once and then walked towards the group on the other end of the room. 

Yup, it really was him. It almost felt like a deja-vu - three years ago it had been a party just like this one. A little smaller, and all of the guests had been wasted high school students who used their remaining two brain cells for staring at people's breasts or running to the bathroom every few minutes, either to throw up or to check their make-up.

Quite obviously, Elliot had never liked parties. But just like today, Angela had convinced him to go. "Just for an hour or two, pretty please!"

But then there he was, the guy of Elliot's dreams, smiling at him across the room and it began - the most terrible, wonderful, heartwrenching love of Elliot's life.

"We'll stay friends", he had promised, in Elliot's arms at the airport before he went back to Sweden. And even then his heart was breaking because Tyrell Wellick had never, at no point in time, been like a friend to him.

He had freaked out and high-fived him, pretending to share his excitement, every time Tyrell made out with another pretty, popular girl, or another football player. Yes, he was THAT guy. Came to America for one year and had sex with what seemed like the entire school - or, well, everyone except Elliot.

And even now he had the attention of everyone around him. It was something about his attitude, something Elliot envied him for, while at the same time he knew he didn't really want to be that way.

It wasn't in his nature. He was the guy who made out with people when he was absolutely wasted, and then had them text him the next day: "Hey, I'm sorry. I usually never do stuff like that. I was really drunk."

And maybe, deep down, he simply didn't feel like he deserved more than that. To say the least, it certainly never surprised him.

His throat felt so dry, he was already craving another drink. Seeing Tyrell here was more than he ever could've dreamed of, and everything he feared.

He hated Tyrell for leaving him, hated him for simply not understanding what Elliot really felt for him... and he hated himself for not being able to remain friends with the person he had once loved more than anyone else in the world.

And wasn't love supposed to be selfless?

He couldn't bear it any longer. Every cell in his body was longing to walk towards him and hug him just one more time, or tell him to never ever leave him again.

Only a few shaking steps further and Tyrell finally recognized him. His face froze in disbelief, then it lit up as if someone had turned back on the lights in there.

"ELLIOT!" He yelled and pushed the girl next to him aside to walk towards Elliot, taking him in his arms and almost squeezing him to death. 

Elliot swallowed down the lump in his throat, fighting back the tears, as he breathed in the scent he hadn't thought he would ever smell again. Something flowery, never too much though, and something that was just so completely unique for Tyrell.

"What are you doing here?" he squeezed out when Tyrell eventually let go of him.

"I'm visiting my host family", Tyrell said, still the widest grin on his face. "You know I really thought about telling you... but... you know, you never texted back anymore so..."

The pain in his voice made Elliot want to punch himself.

"Yeah sorry, I'm so sorry, I was just really busy with graduation and college, you know?"

The truth was that he had thought it was better off this way. A whole ocean between them, and there was no way he would ever get over the Swede with the striking blue eyes, if he kept seeing the status updates of all the beautiful things and beautiful people he was doing now.

Tyrell shrugged and the smile returned to his face. "That's fine. Hey, I'm here now. And I'm staying for another week so we could hang out a bit if you want." 

The sparks in Elliot's stomach felt like he was going to explode and set the whole room on fire. Another week... so much and so little at the same time. It made his heart hurt.

"Maybe you could show us around a bit? It's been so long and the city changed quite a bit... I'm not really being the best tourist guide for Jonah." He laughed.

With every word Tyrell said, the clear blue sky of Elliot's mood got more and more cloudy. He could already feel the storm coming up.

"Jonah?"

"Yeah. Oh, sorry, I forgot you don't know each other yet." He put his arm around a small, dark haired guy standing a bit aside and pulled him away from the conversation he was currently having.

"Jonah? That's Elliot, my friend from America. Elliot, that's my boyfriend Jonah."

Boom. There it was, like a thunderbolt hitting Elliot's head and burning him to the ground. 

I need a cigarette, Elliot thought. Where the fuck....

"Hi Elliot. I heard a lot about you." Jonah smiled and reached out his hand. It would've been easier if he had been an asshole. Elliot's mind kept racing and yet he had no idea what to say.

'Hey, you seem like a sweet guy. You look cute together. But all I can think about is stealing your boyfriend and kissing him until he forgets how to breathe'.... Well, not a great idea.

"Hi." Elliot cleared his throat, then he looked at Tyrell. "Can we maybe go outside and have a smoke?"

"Oh, I don't smoke anymore. But sure." He gave Jonah a way too exaggerated kiss that almost seemed like a provocation to Elliot. Elliot bit his tongue so hard he tasted blood.

What on earth had happened? Tyrell drinking cocktails? Tyrell not smoking anymore? Tyrell in an actual committed relationship?

He shook his head and walked towards the exit, convinced that Tyrell would follow him.

The cold wind on his skin felt amazing. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths, then took out his cigarettes.

"Is everything alright?" Tyrell appeared next to him, looking a bit concerned.

Elliot nodded slowly. "It's a bit overwhelming seeing you here."

"Overwhelming?" He frowned. "Aren't you happy to see me?"

"Yeah." Elliot sighed. "But .... don't you have all these memories coming back up?"

Now Tyrell seemed to understand. He smiled. "Yeah. It was intense back then."

Both laughed, lost in memories. Taking another drag from his cigarette, Elliot tried to stop himself from comstantly looking at his lips... lips that had kissed someone else only moments ago. He must've completely gone insane - or maybe it was the alcohol.

But fuck it.

"I loved you", Elliot said, not averting his gaze, feeling braver than he ever had before. "I really, really loved you."

Tyrell's face went soft. "I loved you too."

"No you didn't." Elliot blew out the smoke and shook his head. "You liked me. You liked spending time with me. But I loved you."

He pursed his lips. "You know there's different kinds of love right? I did love you. You were the only person in this shit city I really trusted, El."

The old nickname, without a warning. Elliot could almost feel himself tearing up again. Walking around the city and singing their favorite songs together. All the baseball games. The nights at Elliot's place, cuddled up, watching movies under a huge blanket. Tyrell's hands in the pockets of Elliot's hoodie when it got cold outside. Trying to hold back their laughter in class when they were supposed to be quiet but something was just so hilarious, something only the two of them would find funny. Memories, memories, memories. 

"I just don't understand how you didn't know ... I think you knew. You always knew how I felt about you. You just didn't care. It was too much discomfort for you to stop hanging out with me. But you didn't even like me enough to tell me it was not gonna happen."

He didn't disagree, he just looked at the floor.

"I just hoped your feelings would go away eventually, you know. I needed you as a friend. But I also know that... sexual tension was always between us. I'm not completely stupid. It was just... never more than that."

The truth hurt more than anything he could have made up in his mind. 

"What we had was just so delicate, you know? We didn't have much time anyways. I didn't wanna destroy all of that, destroy that beautiful friendship... just because we wanted to fuck each other." 

Elliot squinted his eyes shut, shaking his head. 

"El, I loved you so much. And yes, I knew. But those people I had sex with back then... they were meaningless. You meant something to me. And I wasn't ready for that. I'm so sorry, I wish I had met you later in life." 

His eyes still closed, trying to keep himself from crying, Elliot shook his head again. "Don't do this. You have Jonah now-" 

But before he could say another word, Tyrell stepped forward and took the cigarette out of his mouth, taking a drag himself and gazing into his eyes, now wide open, taking in every inch of Tyrell face. This beautiful, familiar face. He couldn't handle it anymore - Too much old, dusty pain coming up from his subconscious, too many sleepless nights when all he saw in front of his inner eye, was this face. 

Then Tyrell put his lips on his.

It was only a second or two, but Elliot kept his eyes closed, breathing him in, while his stomach felt like the explosion had finally gone of. Tyrell stroked the side of his neck, sending shivers down his spine, pulling him closer. Tears started filling Elliot's eyes, and he could've sworn he felt some wetness on the other man's cheek as well, when he put a hand on his face, holding him. Then Tyrell slowly pulled away.

"Goodnight, Elliot." He put the cigarette back between his lips. "I'd be happy if you called me someday. When you're ready." He stroked his cheek, almost as if he was fragile, delicate. "And I'd love to meet your future boyfriend. Gotta make sure my former best friend gets the treatment he deserves."

With a sad smile on his lips, he disappeared back inside the building.

Elliot looked after him, the feathery walk he had seen so many times, now for the last time walking away from him.

He turned around, and went home.  
The wind suddenly didn't feel so cold anymore. It was refreshing, taking away the heat.

Making room for something new, something different. Something more.


End file.
